” A cheerful frame of mind, reinforced by relaxation is the medicine that puts all ghosts of fear on the run”. – George Matthew Adams
The month of August has been a strong testament to the power of the mind and positive thinking. The stormy, temperamental clouds swept in bringing more thunder, unease and chaos feeling like a mirror to my own personal state of mind. Life has been hectic, a bit stormy with excitement, adventure and noise followed by few tiny periods of calm and tranquility. All in all it has left me feeling a bit unbalanced, overwhelmed and fatigued.
I’ve realized that there are many things I cannot control yet there are also plenty that I can. It is understanding the difference between the two which makes all the difference in my daily life. When I get too busy and don’t take enough time to relax, my head fills up with non stop chatter and feels like it is going to explode. That is when I need to take a step back and realize that it is time to prioritize the things I can and cannot control.
I’ve given myself the freedom to step back from the blog, to let the unedited photos rest, and take a moment to just breathe. I cannot produce quality content when my head is so rushed with thoughts and there is not enough time in the day to sit still for five minutes. My time will come.
Life is once about to significantly change this Monday when my children go back to school. My life will free up once again and the stormy clouds will dissipate as the fresh, pure air of Fall blows in. Yet it is bittersweet. The end of yet another summer and my oldest child, Max starting middle school and my daughter Sophia already heading to fourth grade. It feels like the summer came and went in a blink of the eye. That is perhaps why I’m feeling so utterly overwhelmed. I just wish time could slow down for a minute.
It is when I get to this point where I am not sleeping well, my head aches and I’m so flustered a simple thing makes me want to burst into tears that I realize it is time to slow down. To step back, and embrace and enjoy life. To get a different frame of mind because nothing is more important than this very moment. This day and this life. Before I know it, the kids will be all grown up and starting families of their own.
It is times like these when I turn to the words of this beautiful poem to help guide me and reassure me that it is simply ok to let go. To not pressure myself to be a supermom and just enjoy being fun-loving, adventurous sometimes type A me. It will all be ok. My blog won’t flop, my readers hopefully won’t leave or forget me, my stats won’t go down. Maybe I won’t have the career I imagined but that doesn’t mean the future isn’t bright. Instead, it is important to enjoy this precious time with my family and children. My time will come and I’ll be ready.
The Summer Day
Who made the world?
Who made the swan, and the black bear?
Who made the grasshopper?
This grasshopper, I mean– the one who has flung herself out of the grass,
the one who is eating sugar out of my hand,
who is moving her jaws back and forth instead of up and down–
who is gazing around with her enormous and complicated eyes.
Now she lifts her pale forearms and thoroughly washes her face.
Now she snaps her wings open, and floats away.
I don’t know exactly what a prayer is.
I do know how to pay attention, how to fall down
into the grass, how to kneel down in the grass,
how to be idle and blessed, how to stroll through the fields,
which is what I have been doing all day.
Tell me, what else should I have done?
Doesn’t everything die at last, and too soon?
Tell me, what is it you plan to do
with your one wild and precious life?